"It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection." Page 95I think this is so important for so many reasons. As a woman, and more importantly as a mom, I find myself trying to live up to the expectations of others. And by others, I really mean my own misguided expectations of what I think people expect of a mother in her thirties.
As little girls, we all picture our grown-up lives and what we want it to include. For me, the fantasy always included a handsome husband, a couple of kids and a full-time job where I was able to be prove how wonderful and smart I was! Even though not everyone wants what I wanted, I still thought that that is what was expected of me. I didn't work long and hard in school to be a stay at home mom, living on my husband's money! But somehow, that's what I'm doing. Sort of.
The older I have gotten, the more that fantasy has changed. Being a stay at home became a privilege and a luxury that many mothers wished they could afford. I can now appreciate what I have and I feel so lucky to be the one that has raised my children- every day. I still feel the need to try and show the world how wonderful and smart I am, but I'm trying to live MY life better-- not the life I think I should have had, or the one I thought society/my friends/my family may have expected of me. I no longer strive for perfection, which is remarkably freeing!
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"You're like a dog at the dump, baby-- you're just lickin' at the empty tin can, trying to get more nutrition out of it. And if you're not careful, that can's gonna get stuck on your snout forever and make your life miserable. So drop it." page 149This little bit of wisdom can be applied to so many situations in life. Whether you're hanging on to the "one that got away," or you can't let go of the guilt from past mistakes, it's usually just better to drop it! Let it go and accept it for what it is. Life is too short to stay focused on the negative.
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This next one pretty much speaks for itself. If we could all do this there would be a lot less religious strife in the world.
"I have good idea, for if you meet some person from different religion and he want to make argument about God. My idea is, you listen to everything this man say about God. Never argue about God with him. Best thing to say is, 'I agree with you.' Then you go home, pray what you want. This is my idea for people to have peace about religion." p 241In other words, can't we all just get along?!
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"Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it." p 260I believe this whole heartedly. Happiness isn't an accident or a stroke of luck. Like most worthy things in life, one has to put in some effort...take some personal responsibility. I think that it is up to each of us to decide our own destiny.
Perhaps this is a concept that is easier for me to subscribe to, since I don't put my happiness in God's hands. I know enough people who give Him the glory for all good things in their life, and fault themselves for any negative happenings. I don't get that. But if you think about it, you can believe in both. If you believe God will provide the happiness that you seek, then your job, your personal responsibility is to pray, and do the things that make you feel closer to God. Either way, happiness doesn't just land in your lap.
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And finally, a quote about love. That is, after all, what this book was about, right?
"To lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balanced life." p 298I love this quote in particular because I think that's the beauty of love...it's knocks you off your feet, making you unbalanced, but without it, there is no balance in your life.
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